I have helped about a dozen couples create collaborative pre- and post-nuptial agreements. When people get married or are already married, they can discuss their financial expectations and clarify how they will handle money. Since money is an emotional topic, and legal ramifications of certain financial choices may not be clear to both people, talking with a collaborative divorce attorney before a marriage or early on in a relationship can minimize conflict during the relationship.

Collaborative pre- or post-nuptial attorneys help couples create shared understandings of their actions and put them in writing. Each person gives informed consent to these agreements because each of them gets independent legal advice from lawyers who are supporting both people and their relationship. The lawyers do this by facilitating conversations that can be challenging. For example, newly married people prefer not to talk about what they will do with their property if they decide to divorce. They also tend to avoid discussing one another’s eventual death, and what that means as far as property distribution.

Pre- and post-nuptial agreements outline not only who receives what if a couple separates or divorces; but also, they address their finances both during their marriage and after their death. Clarifying expectations is good practice for people who value relationships. Collaborative divorce professionals support people having these kinds of conversations. The couple not only gets information; but also the presence of a professional can help people create emotional safety for themselves.

Unbundled Legal Services, i.e. Preparing or Reviewing Legal Documents

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I provide unbundled legal services, which include discrete tasks such as preparing or reviewing  legal documents about people’s relationships, whether they are living together, contemplating marriage, separating or divorcing.  If one or the other partner has done one or more of the following, they might consider asking for unbundled legal services:

1. Drafted the documents themselves,
2. Drafted the documents with the help of AI, and need to check AI’s accuracy.
3. Had a mediator create a document, usually a Memorandum of Understanding,
4. Had their spouse’s lawyer draft documents,
5. Had a mental health professional create a document, usually a Memorandum of Understanding about a Parenting Plan,
6. Had questions about what to include in the documents, how to say it, how to interpret language or how to clarify terms.
7. Needed advice on how to handle conflict in their relationship,
8. Needed a referral to another professional who could work with them efficiently and cost-effectively.

I work primarily over Zoom and  meet in person by mutual agreement.

I empathize with and have compassion for people making relationship changes. I am a member of the Religious Society of Friends, (Quakers), whose values I share below. My work aligns with my values.

Philosophy on Work and Life

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I enjoy supporting people whose relationships are in transition. They have the opportunity to be vulnerable enough to tell their truths, and to take time to evolve into a new version of themselves. Although they often feel mad, sad, glad or scared, they can use that energy to close one chapter and decide to write a new one.

Although I usually work with people at the end of their relationships, I also engage with people who are nearer the beginning of their relationship. If they decide to marry and/or live together, having a conversation with a lawyer can be helpful. I help people create the safety they need to speak and listen to one another during challenging conversations. I practice and teach conflict management skills, which start with  treating people with kindness and respect.